Forgiveness Vs. Unforgiveness

Sylvia Wright, LMSW
Aug 31, 2016
2 min read

If I hear one more person say forgiveness is for you not the other person, I think I will scream.

I heard Tyler Perry say it one too many times in his many Madea movies. It makes sense, but then it doesn’t make sense, if that makes sense.

How can forgiving someone be for me?

Then I started thinking biblically. What if God did not forgive us of wrongs/sins? We would be in a pickle! Consider this, what if every time you did not forgive someone, God did not forgive you.

One for one, don’t forgive, don’t get forgiven.

Remember when you lied? Remember when your “friend” lied on you?

Remember when you stole? Remember when someone stole from you?

Remember when you broke someone’s heart, disappointed someone, didn’t show care for someone….

Imagine if all those things were held against you?

Where would you stand? How could you stand before a righteous God?

Ok. So you don’t want to get that “religious”, alright, how about if unforgiveness was like a sore that just would not heal. Every time you failed to forgive, it was like rubbing salt in that wound, your own wound. Who would do that? Not a sane person in the world would rub salt in their own open wound.

Imagine if holding onto hurt was that way, rubbing salt in your own wound. Well you would forgive if it would allow you to heal. Wouldn’t you?

Unforgiveness is exactly like that. Failing to forgive equals you not being able to heal.

In relationships, this equals disaster as you mount up a case against the one you’re supposed to love. Some of the charges are for their crimes but others are for crimes committed by others that have been festering for years. Why bring all those open wounds with you from relationship to relationship.

Forgiveness helps you let go and move on with healing and closure. It allows you to enter relationships healthy and whole.

Yes its true forgiveness is for you and it’s also for all those who love you and want to love you.

Try it and see!